MRS JAMES RECOMMENDS

K-BEAUTY, MAKEUP & LIFESTYLE BLOG

STARTED THE NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION EARLY AND LESSONS LEARNED FROM 2015






I never make any New Year's resolutions on New Year's Day . First because I am too busy having fun that day with my family and second because I don't believe in making resolutions like that. I make decisions and resolutions on daily basis, and when I make a resolution I stick to it, nearly always. When asked about what I intend to give up to become a better person for 2016? Well, every year I give up the same thing...I give up giving up things and just do it! Not very original but at least I'm consistent.

2015 was a phenomenal and horrible year for me at the same time. I hope you’re saying the same (not the horrible part of course). One of the most important things I’ve learned this year, well, loved the past few years, is that self-improvement is crucial to our well-being. Whether we are physically improving our health, emotionally enhancing our state of being or intellectually learning and growing, becoming better is one of the most important things we can do to work towards being happier and more productive people. As I look back on 2015, from giving up a well paid job to doing my dream job in London, to losing my Dad to cancer, deciding on going through IVF/ICSI treatment and focusing my energy to where I’m passionate about which is beauty and Makeup Artistry— I reflect on the small yet significant things I did to become better. I encourage you to do the same and pat yourself on the back for taking steps that are not always easy or fun to take, but so important. Overtime we think a positive thought or participate in an act of kindness towards ourselves or towards others, we are becoming better…

Here’s just a list I did (and learned from the past years) to grow this year and will take with me in the coming year. Try writing down the things you did this year that make you feel good inside and also start thinking about things you can do next year towards your goals.

*PRACTICE GRATITUDE.
Look at the bright side of things. The benefits of practicing gratitude are nearly endless. people who regularly practice gratitude by taking time to notice and reflect upon the things they’re thankful for experience more positive emotions, feel more alive, sleep better, express more compassion and kindness, and even have stronger immune system. And gratitude doesn’t need to be reserved only for momentous occasions: Sure you might express gratitude after receiving promotion at work, but you can also be thankful; for something as simple as a delicious piece of peanut butter and banana cupcake. Gratitude attracts more goodness and positivity in Life.

*LET GO OF DEFENSIVENESS.
Save yourself and everybody time by skipping the excuses and bullshit. Beware of denial, intellectualisation, rationalisation, projection and look at yourself and your Life honestly. Seek therapy, support groups and the counsel of good friends and family for perspective. It is only when we let down our defensive wall that we can truly do our deeper work and grow.

*BE AUTHENTIC.
 Be genuine and real. Have the courage and confidence to be yourself. Do not say things that are false, even to yourself.

*BE DIRECT.
Say what you mean and mean what you say. The Truth will set you free. Talk with the person you have issue with, rather than triangulating others. Avoid passive-aggressive tactics to get your message across like not responding to emails or calls and etc.

*FORGIVE AND LET GO OF RESENTMENTS
If for no other reason than for yourself, forgive to release yourself from the negative experiences from the past. During times of prayer or meditation, give thanks for the wisdom and knowledge gained from your suffering. Practice the mantra, “I forgive you and I release you .”

*REFLECT EMPATHY
Let go of the need for judgement. Have the ability to put yourself in somebody else’s shoes, consider how they might feel and reflect that back to them as appropriate.

*PRACTICE ACCEPTANCE
Don’t be reactive or get hooked. Don’t spend your energy fighting or resisting what you can't change (other people, their feelings, their behaviours , etc.). Instead, empower yourself to change what you can ( your thinking, your behaviours, your boundaries,etc.)

*BE KIND AND COMPASSIONATE 
Only say things if they are kind, necessary and true. Give more. Be of service to others. Consider the needs and feelings of others before any action. I tried my absolute best to complain less and give more the positive me even when you are down. Give more of yourself where it matters and where it makes an impact; reap the benefits of positive energy and positive attitude.

*HAVE INTEGRITY
Do what you say you’re going to do. If things have changed and you are moving in a different direction, be honest and clear with other. Be reliable and consistent. Admit when you’re wrong. Apologise and make amends as needed.


*LISTS, LISTS AND MORE LISTS
I make lists all the time. I'm obsessed with it. When I started to blog again after a year of being MIA, (I know, naughty me), first thing I bought was my Kate Spade Organiser, Dear me NotepadKatie Leamon notebooks and my Blogging Planner. It makes planning ahead easy.

*LEARN SOMETHING NEW AND CHALLENGE YOURSELF
When Im feeling stuck , I know that I need to change and learn something new. Hated the gym before and treadmills so learned something new. I discovered MMA 3 years ago. I used to train 2x everyday like kickboxing and Jiu-jitso. It just makes losing weight so fun! It’s hard but it gives you good results in the end. I love fighting, keeps me calm, fit, happy and disciplined. I haven’t been training for quite awhile now and I missed it. So yes I really recommend learning something new, do something that’s out of your comfort zone! Like maybe Cross fit training , join Tough Mudder maybe or a marathon to Salsa dancing! The main thing is enjoy yourself!

*READ BOOKS THAT INSPIRE YOU
Besides makeup books and books about Art really, I love reading stuff about beauty culture from around the world especially the Korean Beauty Culture. I’m such a huge fan of their Culture in general. I certainly believe I'm Korean in my past Life. I just love everything about it; K-dramas, K-pop, Korean Food and most of all K-Beauty! Currently my favourite reads are “Korean Beauty Secrets” by Kerry Thompson & Coco Park and “The Little Book of Skincare” by the lovely Charlotte Cho of Soko Glam. So as of last month actually ( because I’m so motivated ), gave myself a skincare challenge; The Korean Skincare routine (sticking to it now definitely). Adapting the “Skin First’’ philosophy in my Life. Always been a skincare junkie so I’m enjoying and loving it as of the moment! Taking care of your skin doesn’t  need to feel like it’s a chore! Enjoy it! After all you’ve only got one skin only!

*DECLUTTERING YOUR LIFE
Marie “KonMari” Kondo’s book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organising (one of my top reads this year) is a best-seller in Japan, Germany, and the U.K.  Kondo favours a radical approach to decluttering that advocates downsizing your stuff in one fell swoop; insists that storage containers promote hoarding, not organisation; and takes an emotional approach to helping people discard excess possessions.Excerpts from the book that argues that those unable to separate from their possessions suffer from an attachment to the past or anxiety about the future. “Discard anything that doesn’t spark joy.” If you have tried this method even a little, you have realised by now that it is not that difficult to identify something that brings you joy. The moment you touch it, you know the answer. There’s a point, almost halfway through bestselling book , where she politely invites the reader to chuck it in the bin. This is the call of the clutter therapist. Get rid, purge, clear, toss, abandon, and with relish, too. This is the message of the fastest growing self-help sub-genre, itself the world’s bestselling genre. And it’s one that has arrived at exactly the right time. The best way to find out what we really need is to get rid of what we don’t. I love decluttering, it clears up my complicated chaotic mind haha. When the house is uncluttered , clean and smelling good— I feel good as well and get things done so quick. Try it, you might love it!

*CUT OUT NEGATIVITY
The season’s festivity is enough excuse to prolong your cheat days and eat your heart out. But as you put on those holiday calories, how about you cut off on other things that had weighed your 2015 down? Yep no questions asked. Life is too short to allow negative people or situations take over. It wasn’t always easy but it’s the healthiest things I’ve done. Cut out negative friends, removing myself on situations that made me feel shit. I stopped committing to things that I really didn’t want to do and avoided the drama and the self-pity parties that are taking place around me. What was the result? I elevated. I felt light and free and motivated continue forward and more importantly, 
spend my energy and love on the positive people who deserve my love and attention.

*LOVE YOURSELF
The most important of all! Practice self-compassion and self-care. Understand  you are exactly as you should be and are perfectly lovable as you are. Forgive yourself and understand that you are human and nobody is perfect. Celebrate your Life, your unique spirit and gifts. Take excellent care of yourself and surround yourself with people who love you, want the very best for you and will help you grow.

2016 is going to be a GREAT year, I definitely can feel it! Yah I know we say that every year but why wouldn’t we say that each year? I encourage you to aim endlessly high this year and try the things that scares you. Do your best to be a better human being and try to learn on how you can optimise who you are as a person and the energy you put out into the world.




Love and light,

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